Complaining is a habit

"Happiness is a habit." I read this sometime in my 20s. It’s a simple line, but I found it helpful. Especially when the going got tough (as things usually get with being a founder).

But it's not always easy. 2025:

On the personal front, my wife left a startup, and we were in no hurry to plan a family.

We took a wild decision that I rarely saw people in their early 30s do:

Leave our home, do a semi long-distance marriage, and figure out what careers we want to pursue and subsequently decide which city to live in.

Why choose a city just because you happen to be in it? Why limit your opportunity pool?

Thus, started our wild experiment.

On the work front, my cofounder and I are excited about everything to do with AI. We believed we were locked into a new idea. We started working on it. Within 5 weeks, with sleepless nights and bloodshot eyes, we were speaking with Garry Tan from YC. Looks like we are onto something.

After that, with every week, my impatience compounded. Why are we not getting new customers? When are we going to know that we are on the right idea at the right time?

During this time, I lived in 4 cities across 2 countries. I stayed a few months with my cofounder, a few weeks with my friend's sister, and a few days in a shady Airbnb. When the Airbnb was tough to stay in for extended periods, I crashed at my wife's friends' place before finally landing in my sister's home.

Here was a married dude who's asking married people in their thirties that he will crash at their place until who-knows-when.

My wife was jumping from startup to startup, trying to find a role she loves. One of them shut down because they were out of funds (again). She walked out of the next one because of cultural misfit.

My impatience grew with every hop. How come neither of us is finding what we were looking for?

Looking back, my first reaction is "Ah. The year that was".

It taught me something new: Complaining is a habit as well. It creeps in slowly, when you think it's justified. Especially when you are not able to connect the dots. But,

Through all the craziness, I got to spend time with friends and family in a way that I don't think others in 30s get to do.

I got to teach Catan to my family (who are now addicts of the game). I cooked along with my friends, one of them now is building a supper club community. And, I spent quality living time with my co-founder and her husband (unlike any other founders I know of).

Professionally, I gave a shot at a startup (again), and when I decided to join Mistral in Singapore by the end of the year, I knew it was the right choice. There were no regrets.

Now that I look back, it doesn't feel like a hard year. It was full of rich moments with sweet surprises. I am now settled in Singapore with a home that I like and grounding that I savor in my heart.

The only thing I would do differently- I would complain less. It's slightly addictive. If given a chance, I would do it less because dots were getting connected to somewhere meaningful.